HAPPY! HAPPY!

Here's the letter I wanted to include with our Christmas Card:

HO HO HO!  Happy Winter! Happy Holidays!  Here’s wishing you a year free of poopy diapers, full of afternoon naps and nightly uninterrupted 8 hour stretches of sleep.  There’s a small chance we are projecting our desires.  But I doubt it.  Oh yeah, and tasty donuts, wishing you lots of tasty donuts this year.

What is there to say?  We are thankful for you, our dear friends and family, even if some of you  do start to feel like only figments of our imagination given how long we’ve been out of touch.  Please forgive us!  Since we live in the Dirty South (of Alaska), naturally we listen to a lot of crunk, and we kind of feel like we are on Lil Jon’s wavelength as we chase around our mini-ninjas.  You know, it’s like a semi-truck, no fuckin’ brakes, outta control like a bull out da gate.  We get bananas like a room full of apes.  Over here with our ninjas in the mosh pit.  Etc.  The main difference is we shake our mullets, not our dreds, and we’re chasing root beer with root beer instead of vodka with patron. Yeah, we lost it.  You get the point.  

Those of you chasing multiple miniature versions of yourselves around know what we are talking about.  Those of you who aren’t, please, take an afternoon nap and love it!

I was afraid that our annual Christmas card might be unacceptable, containing a reference to Lil Jon’s Outta Your Mind and all.  But I’m told that this letter will be acceptable as long as it contains no references to yeast infections, and I can assure you, I will not be talking about yeast infections, no matter how uncomfortable or itchy they may be.  On a side note, we’ve been eating a lot of plain Greek yogurt and taking garlic and oregano supplements.  I’d encourage you to do it, too.  No reason, really.  Just something to think about.  The odorless garlic is probably the best, unless you fear vampires or want to live the single life for a while.

Let’s see... we enjoyed immensely a few months of focusing on our family without the hindrance of having to work, thanks to FMLA.  Those months flew by, and during that time we managed to wander around and introduce Huxley to a number of folks in America.  Dawson tried his hand at being a stay at home dad for a few weeks, but unfortunately, we had to fire him after he let Stokes and Pax start Huxley on fire.  Just kidding about that last part.  No fires or firing was involved.  Were? Was?  What is this, a grammar test?  

As it turns out, working and chasing three mini-ninjas is pretty time consuming.  Our Kodiak summer this year was awesome, lots of blue sky beach days.  We caught a few fish, subsistence style, red salmon mostly.  Dawson tried his hand (net) at the Copper River, and survived, deliciously, if not fruitfully.  We’re definitely working on our skills in that area.  This year, we came very close to actually catching a silver salmon.  

Pax is five, Stokes is three, and by the time you get this, they’ll both be in pre-school.  Hux is almost one, almost walking, and mostly pooping in the toilet.  Yay, EC!  We are believers! (Google it.  Or not.  It’s all about poop, and getting it into the toilet, so if that’s not a pressing challenge in your life, you may want to skip it.)  

As the kids grow, we’ve definitely noticed an increase in our food consumption.  In many ways, we are counting on them to actually know how to catch some of the many tasty wild animals found here on Kodiak.  At least, better than their parents can!  We’re hoping they can learn from their friends.  So far, Genevieve wins the title of great provider.  She’s come home with multiple silver, red, and pink salmon.  Come visit some time, and she’ll cook some up for you!  Mmmm...

Have a great 2012!  Here’s hoping you live it so awesomely that you won’t even care if Earth collides with Nibiru!#  That’s scheduled for 12/21/2012, in case you want to make plans.  Hey, laugh if you want to, but it’s on the internets.  I know we’ll be planning accordingly.   

Cheers and love and hugs and kisses from Team Wilco,


Dawson, Genevieve, Paxson, Stokely, and Huxley

Here's what we actually said:

HAPPY WINTER!

Cheers to you!  To both of our readers, if you didn't get a card, that means we have your wrong address.  Please update us.